Wednesday, July 18, 2012

Patience

Well, so far most of these things have been about how changing certain things in my life have changed the direction that things were and are going. This one is going to be a little different... Instead of talking about something that I have overcome... I think that I will tell you about something that I still struggle with on a daily basis.


Patience... This is still a hard struggle for me. There are very few things that I actually do have patience for. My TY I have buckets of patience for. Big, traumatic and/or catastrophic issues that come up, I am good with those. I can handle those types of things with no issues at all. With the problem solving skills that I have come to be able to use, these are not the things that I am talking about.


Let's start with me being an instant gratification kinda guy. If there is something that I want in life, I GET IT! No matter what I will find a way. If it is a monetary issue, I figure out how much it is going to take, work that by how many extra shifts that is, and work it until I get it. If it is personal I usually am able to just reach out there and snatch it to me. 


There are some things that just set me off EVERY time though. These are the things that upset me the most. Not really even because of the event, it is because, usually, I revert back to the snap-out artist of the past. I would like to believe that I am the more kinder, gentler me, but I am finding that I can slip right back there with ease. 


And it is the most simple things that send me back there. Just some insignificant person at work running their mouth, or that something that the Little Miss says that strikes me wrong, or my disrespectful mother smoking in the house that push me. Like I said, it is the little things that I am struggling to gain control over. These things are insignificant in the grand scheme of things. However, in the moment send me far past a point that I like to be now. 


So as I sit here tonight... My patience pushed to their breaking point... I don't know how to gain any more patience... The consensus is that it comes with age or knowledge or wisdom. I guess in order to gain patience, I am going to have to exercise patience. I am guessing that it is a learned habit. One that I have to learn on my own, because in my household growing up it was easier to flip over a table than to exercise patience. 




At my wits end.
Michael

1 comment:

  1. It is very much a learned habit, it is not something that happens over night, it it not something that you can reach out there and grab. It is one of those things that when you feel that you are about to flip over something, you have to bight the bullet and fight the inner will to explode and in turn you will learn patience. It is definitely a learned habit. Love You, Brother!!!!!

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